A solid foundation.

In order to deal with life’s challenges. In order to become the person you want to be. You must first create an environment which promotes and stimulates growth. If you were trying to grow a plant from a seed, you would need to plant it in nutrient rich soil. Make sure it has enough sunlight and water. In ideal conditions it will flourish and grow. If it were neglected or not given a suitable environment, it would surely perish and wither. You are like the seed. In order to flourish you must give yourself the best possible set of circumstances in which to do so. You must look after yourself physically, emotionally and spiritually.

Play the hand you are dealt.

I'm not just talking about cards of course, but life in general. We don't always get what we want but we usually get what we need. If you can just find the lesson in whatever happens to you, your life will be a happier one. This applies to both the good and the bad.
Susan Jeffers (a well known self help author) suggest that we learn to say 'YES' to whatever happens in our lives. Why don't you give it a try today and see if it makes a difference?


We all have them. Some are bad for us, like smoking for example. However we continue to do it. There are habits that perhaps not quite so noticeable, but still bad for us. A good example of this would be negative thoughts. Why not keep a pen and paper to hand and make note every time you have a negative thought. It might surprise you how often this is.
You might find these thoughts will decrease over time simply because you are marking down on a piece of paper. Why not give it a try?

Meaningless talk

I watched the last 15 minutes of 'Coronation Street' yesterday. This a famous Soap Opera in the UK. Most of what I saw revolved around gossip. Talking about other people, often with negative conotations. Could it be that we see this sort of behaviour on the television and adopt it as the norm. Who does it serve to engage in meaningless and negative thoughts about others. Certainly not us.
Consider this also; if you talk to someone negatively about another person, behind their back, the person you are talking to may be thinking that you will likely do the same to them.

End to suffering

All sentient beings wish to be free of suffering and experience hapiness. If you take this thought with you throughout your day you may perceive things very differently. As a starting point resolve to never harm or kill another living creature.

Be a good listener.

When I was a young man: a good friend of mine, who was a bit of a Romeo, gave me sound advice about how to interact with members of the opposite sex.  He said, be interested.  Ask lots of questions and listen to what you are being told.  People love talking about themselves, and at the end of the conversation, if you have listened, the other person will feel great.
 This advice holds true when you talk to anyone.  Maintain eye contact, with soft eyes, to show the person that you are listening and interested.  You never know, you might learn something.

Master the Path of the Peaceful Warrior

You will often hear me raving on about the Peaceful Warrior book series by Dan Millman. Now it is possible to follow the path of the Peaceful Warrior, through an online 12 week course.  I really believe it is worth a look.

The unreachable goal!

Many people are tortured by the unreachable goal of perfectionism.  The sooner we realise that this is not a reasonable target, the happier we will be.  It really doesn't matter, if everything in our life isn't perfect. Obviously there are some things that have to be perfect.  I am thinking of things like medical procedures.  However, it really doesn't matter if our car is dirty, or if we have a hair out of place.  The next time you find yourself obsessed with getting things exactly right, ask yourself does it really matter if this isn't 100% perfect'. It is amazing how relaxing and calming it is to let go of this idea of perfectionism.  (I just caught myself re-reading this text for the third time, checking for errors).Lol

You are not alone!

Try and remember, when life gets tough, you're not alone.  Of the billions of people on the planet, everyone experiences struggles, it is not only you.  If we do not have problems, we would not grow/evolve and not appreciate the good times.  If you remember the adage ' every cloud has a silver lining', you may start to look your difficulties differently.  Try and find the lesson in everything! Do not be afraid to ask for help and do not be afraid to give it.

Be patient.

Sometimes life may seem a bit static.  You may feel like a boat waiting for the tide to come in.  This is a great opportunity to practice patience.  The tide will come in, just make sure you are ready for it.

Let go your Ego.

If ever you are in disagreement with someone consider this.  I'm being open-minded and objective or are you in some way be led by your ego  Try and step outside of yourself for a moment, let go of your ego and see things from the other person's point of view.  It doesn't matter if they do not do the same because you are making forward step.

If you have difficulties......

Life is not always smooth sailing.  We all have difficulties from time to time.  Perhaps health problems, relationship issues, or job worries, very few people are exempt.  So the next time you interact with someone, contemplate that they might be experiencing difficulties like you.  Perhaps even greater difficulties than you.  Adjust your attitude accordingly.  A smile goes a long way.

The secret to Happiness - Part 8 - Finally.

Play and have fun. Again and again. 

The secret to Happiness - Part 7 (who'd have thought it'd be this complex!?)

Initiate, develop and sustain mutually satisfying personal relationships. With others and yourself.

The secret to Happiness - Part 6

Laugh, both at yourself and at the world.

The secret to Happiness - Part 5

Display awareness of others and empathise with them.

The secret to Happiness - Part 4

Work each day towards developing yourself emotionally,intellectually, creatively and spiritually.

The secret to Happiness - Part 3

Use and enjoy solitude.  The one person you have to spend your whole life with is yourself. So enjoy! 

The secret to Happiness - Part 2

Behave in a confident and assertive manner (or calm assertive as Cesar Milan might say).

The secret to Happiness - Part 1

For the next few posts, I shall be suggesting what is needed to secure happiness.  I'm interested to hear your comments.

Today, I suggest:

facing your problems, resolving them and learning from them.

An empty cup!

This extract it's taken from a book called Zen Golf by Dr Joseph Parent:

A young man had read all the books he could find about Zen.  He heard about a great Zen master and requested an appointment to ask for teachings.  When they were seted the young man proceeded to tell the master everything he had understood from his readings, saying that Zen is about this and Zen is about that, and on and on.

After some time, the Master suggested they have tea.  He performed a traditional tea ceremony while the  student sat at attention, bowing when served, saying nothing.  The master began to pour tea into the students cup.  He poured until it was full, and kept pouring.  The tea ran over the edge of the cup and on to the table.  The master kept pouring as the tea ran off the table and onto the floor.  Finally, the student couldn't contain himself any longer, 'Stop!  Stop pouring!  The cup is full-no more will go in!'
The master stopped pouring and said, 'Just like this cup your mind is full of your own opinions and preconceptions.  How can you learn anything unless you first empty your cup?'

Is your cup empty?

A New Year Composition

Go placidly amid the noise and haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.

As far as possible without surrender
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.
Avoid loud and aggressive persons,
they are vexatious to the spirit.

If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain and bitter;
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs;
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals;
and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself.
Especially, do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love;
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment
it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.
You are a child of the universe,
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be,
and whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful.
Strive to be happy.


Thanks to my good friend Virginia for sending me this.