Look after your body.

Throughout your life you will own many different things. You will have many friends who will come and go. You will live in different places. There is one thing however which you are destined to keep for a lifetime. You have just one body and although medical science can replace bits it cannot fix everything. My advice is simple; you have just one body so look after it. This means taking regular exercise, eating healthily, and watching your intake of toxins. It also involves managing your stress and dealing appropriately with your emotions. Often our bodies suffer the brunt of our mental issues.
If you're not sure where to start, the Internet is a wonderful resource. There are plenty of great sites and also access to specialist books on the subject. 

Self-help

The term ‘Self-Help’ receives a bad rap. What on earth can be wrong with using all your knowledge and inherent wisdom to make your own life more rewarding and happy? Let’s face it; if you ask anyone whether they would rather be happy or unhappy, I am positive everyone would say the former. If they did say the latter, it is because they probably enjoy being unhappy and being so would in fact make them happy! ‘Self-Help’ writings have been around for centuries. Ancient Greek philosophers were admired for their insights.  In more modern times these books are often seen as a refuge for those who struggle to cope with life. Recognition of a struggle and the desire to take steps to deal with it shows strength. Proof that you are no longer willing to accept a life of disappointment. This should be applauded, not frowned upon. It shows a willingness to grow and not just plod through life with little or no desire to self-improve. 

A silent thank you.

In an earlier post I mentioned a Shiatsu practitioner called Nicola Morgan whom I met over 20 years ago. She recommended to me the book by Dan Millman called Way of the Peaceful Warrior. It was reading this book that set me on my current path and inspired me to start this site. I never took the opportunity to thank Nicola for guiding me in this direction, so would like to do so now.  I understand that even if she doesn't read this post she was still feel my gratitude.
Why don't you take this opportunity to say thanks to someone in your past who made a difference. Perhaps a teacher or a colleague, an old friend or relation. Although they may not hear you, I am sure your thanks will not go unfelt.

William and Kate in Canada.

I was watching a documentary today about the Royal visit to Canada. I found it very moving. Every single person interviewed (from the onlookers) commented on how the Royal couple seemed to be just like ordinary people. I thought this was a wonderful sentiment, however it occurred to me that there is no such thing as an ordinary person. We are all unique and therefore extraordinary. There is no one else on this planet exactly like another (and that includes identical twins). Remember that fact, in every interaction you have with a fellow human being. Everybody is special, nobody is ordinary, everyone should be treated as extra-ordinary.So the next time you're seeking to your childs teacher; or a bank clerk, remember that they are unique and special, just like you.

Are you too sensitive?

I know that I can be at times. Sometimes it's all too easy to get upset over little things, perhaps something that someone has said or done. But because we are of a sensitive nature, these things can have an effect on us. If this sounds like you, here are some good tips to help you deal with your sensitivity. Firstly, just understanding that you have a sensitive nature can be enough to put things in perspective. Secondly, you can choose to devalue what another person has said or done, especially if it doesn't come from good intentions. Surely, someone who is deliberately trying to upset you, should not be allowed the same consideration as someone who does the opposite.
Finally, you could confront the person. Explaining how their actions make you feel can often have a remarkable effect on your relationship with a person. Do be careful with whom you try this approach. Not everyone is as emotionally intelligent as you.

What are you waiting for?

If we are lucky, we get about 70 or 80 years on this planet. Yet so may of us spend much of his time trying and waiting to be happy. I would like to suggest that perhaps you are trying too hard! Perhaps you are waiting for the right circumstances to be happy and are overlooking all the great things that you have and have experienced which mean you can be happy right now.
There's a well-known saying about stopping to smell the roses. This is something so many of us fail to do. Rather than putting off your happiness until certain conditions arise. Consider what is happening in this moment and whether you are overlooking the joy in your present circumstances.
So rather than wait to get that new job; or find a new love; in order to feel happy, just be happy now at this moment ,with where you are and what you have. Stop delaying your happiness or you may find you put it off indefinitely.

Please have a look around.

I have just had a look back over some of my older posts from previous months.I suggest you do the same.You never know you might find something relevant and interesting. I know I did.
You can also scroll down to the bottom of the page and use the 'search this site' feature!
I would also like to strongly recommend that you check out my 'recommended sites' page. These are links to other sites I have developed with a view to helping you save money or make money.

If you don't try, you won't fail!

As is today's fashion, I have a T-shirt with a slogan on it. This reads ' if you don't try, you won't fail!' What I love about this, is that it suggests that you are better off not giving anything a try, as this means you will never be disappointed. But the most important thing is that it also points to the opposite. If you don't try you won't succeed either!
 I have tried many things in my life, some of which I have been successful at and others of which I have failed miserably. The trick I have learnt is not to see these failures as a bad thing, but rather as an opportunity to learn and grow. It takes a child on average at least 200 attempts at walking before they succeed. Each one of those failures contributes to the ultimate goal. As long as you learn from your mistakes they are not failures. If you never try anything you will never reach your potential and never know just how good you can be.

Have yourself a Ceremony

So often we let our worries get on top of us. Take five minutes, right now, to make a list of all your worries on piece of paper. Put down absolutely everything no matter how small. When you are happy (so to speak) with your list - destroy it! Tear it up, scrunch it up or even shred it! Now allow yourself to be worry free the rest of the day.  

You don't HAVE to win.

Someone once said that life is a game. A game that can't be won but can only be played (I think it was Will Smith in the film The Legend of Bagger Vance). The choice is how do you play the game? Or perhaps you don't play the game, perhaps the game plays you. There is a saying in Golf; let your mood control you're game not you're game control your mood. This could equally be applied to life. When you come across difficulties, how do you approach them? You can treat them as part of the game and play them as well as you can. After all, by adopting the right attitude and putting in enough effort surely the outcome will be more beneficial!
Life is all about the journey, not the destination. Sometimes it's about playing a bad hand well, rather than being dealt the best cards. It is also a matter of perspective. You don't have to win, you just have to know that you have played your best.

Tame your mind

Many of us have little or no control over the ramblings of our mind. In today's busy world we are so used to flitting our attention from one thing to another, that our poor mind gets no rest at all. Even when we sleep out minds slip into frantic dreaming.
 I would like to suggest you might like to have a go at mindfulness meditation. Just take five minutes to sit in comfortable silence and count your breaths. Start with 1 on the in breath and 2 on the out breath. Up to 10 and then start again. I also use the image of my mind as a horse in a huge field that has been let off its leash to run free. At first it goes like the wind, but soon settles and stands still in a relaxed state. You might find that 5 minutes of this every day will have a wonderful rejuvenating effect on your mind and may even help you get a more restorative nights sleep.

Be realistic about happiness

Most of us want to be happy for pretty much most if not all of the time. But let's be realistic about this. No-one can be happy 100% of the time. Life is not always smooth sailing. Sometimes we have to ride the waves of adversity. During these moments it is unrealistic to expect us to be happy, so don't get even more upset because you are not.
I have learnt to be patient and wait for those moments of happiness, no matter how fleeting. I appreciate them even more because I know their true value and I also know they will pass. As will moments of sadness. I believe a good approach is to aim for contentment most of the time. Be content with what you have, where you are and most importantly who you are. Happiness (and sadness) will come and go but you will/can always return to the standpoint of contentment in the end. Be realistic about what happiness is to you and you will appreciate it more.

Count your blessings

So many of us have got into the habit of complaining about things in our lives that we often forget to stop and smell the roses. First thing in the morning, just before you rise, name five things in your life you are thankful for. It could be anything; from having a loving partner to simply having clean water to drink. Repeat this exercise just before you go to sleep in the evening. Try to think of different things each time. Hopefully you will soon generate the habit of being appreciative for the good in your life rather than focusing on the bad, as we so often do.

Headspace

Here is a great website for learning the art of meditation and mindfulness - Headspace. There is also a great App for the iPhone.

Just let go.

Whatever you are worried about, I can almost guarantee that it won't matter in ten years. Maybe not even in 10 days or even 10 hours. Think back to a problem you had ten years ago. I bet it doesn't matter now. What's the use in worrying, it's really not worthwhile. All you end up doing is going from one worry to another. Most of which you will have forgotten about soon enough. If you find yourself moving from one worry to another, try re-framing them in you're mind as a challenge, or a chance to achieve success. This really is a more healthy approach.

Be a good listener.

When in  conversation with another person how often do you use the word I? It is always better to be interested that interesting. Strive to pay attention to what is being said and ask questions about the other person. This is so much better than not really listening and talking about oneself. Unfortunately we often fall into the trap of citing one of our experiences. Is this out of  empathy or is it one upmanship? You have two ears and one mouth, so you should listen twice as much as you talk.

You are unique.

So often we associate ourselves with our jobs so much that we often find it difficult to disassociate ourselves between who we are and what we do. If your job is becoming too important in your life then who are you when not at work. If you are what you do then when you don't you aren't! You are more than your job or Social Security number. You are unique and special person with so many facets. Explore them and enjoy being special.

What a great example.

It's heartening to read this story of the young Japanese golfer giving away this years earnings to help the earthquake/tsunami appeal. If only the whole of humanity acted so selflessly.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2011/mar/31/ryo-ishikawa-money-japan-earthquake-tsunami

Thank you Kaseline.

What a wonderful world we live in. I have been desperately searching for a cougarsamurai image to use for the site. I have been extremely fortunate to find this one and be allowed use of it by Kaseline. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

Our deepest fear

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

by Marianne Williamson

Thanks to my good friend Virginia (once again) for this message.

Where do you live?

This isn't a question about geography. What I really want you to ask yourself is how much time you spend living in the real world and how much time you spend in your head. I know people who are constantly looking to the future. They never exist in the present but are always preparing to do the next thing. The problem with this is that they never actually get anywhere. I know other people who continuously reminisce about the past. However the past doesn't exist except in electrical impulses in the brain.

Learning to pay attention to what is happening to you and around you at this present moment is the key to getting the most out of life. It's not easy. We are so used to living in the past and future that we sometimes find it difficult to be present mind oriented. A great way to do this is to focus on what you are doing at that time. You could be driving your car or brushing your teeth. It doesn't matter so long as you give it your full attention.

Become a Peaceful Warrior

When I was 20 years old I worked in an international college in England during my University holidays. Foreign students would come and stay for several weeks to learn English and socialise with other like-minded people. These were great times for everyone, students and teachers alike. Throughout this time however, I always felt slightly out of place. Not that I didn't belong, but more a feeling of not understanding my purpose.
I was recommended to go and see a Shiatsu (Japanese massage) practitioner called Nicola Morgan. This was a wonderful experience and I revisited Nicola many times. At the end of my first session she recommended a book to me called Way of the Peaceful Warrior by Dan Millman.
I went out and bought this book and it changed my life. The book has now been made into a film. I strongly recommend you try this book, especially if like me you need some direction.

WAY OF THE PEACEFUL WARRIOR

Stillness.

There is a special moment at the end of each out breath; this is a moment of stillness and calm. Just by paying attention to this moment you can actually change your consciousness. Take a deep in breath now and slowly exhale. Pause for a moment and notice the stillness and calm. Repeat this three more times. You should notice a complete change in your consciousness; you should be more relaxed and serene. Use this simple technique throughout your day to bring peace and harmony into your life..

The simple things in life.....

A great way to illicit and change in your mood for the positive is to get a hair cut. A simple thing like having a trim can make cause a dramatic shift in your feelings. Not only will you look better (hopefully), which will raise your self-esteem, but also you will feel better because you have devoted some time and effort to 'yourself'. There's nothing wrong with a bit of pampering once in a while.

Of course there is a hidden meaning in all this; make a conscious effort to sort out what needs to be sorted and the results can only be for the good. Start with the simple things in life and then move on to the less simple. Lots of small little changes for the better soon add up to greater peace and well being.

Help please!

I need some help. If there is anyone out there who can design a great 'cougarsamurai' logo that I can use, that would be awesome. I have tried but my computer/art skills are poor. Lol
I was thinking of a meditating samurai seated cross legged next to a cougar - maybe. Any help would really be appreciated. :)

Moments

A little something to ponder:
If I could live again my life,
In the next one – I’d try to make more mistakes,
I wouldn’t try to be so perfect, I’d be more relaxed,
I’d be sillier than I’ve been,
In fact, I’d take things much less seriously.
I’d be less hygenic.
I’d run more risks,
take more trips,
watch more sunsets.
I’d climb more mountains, swim more rivers,
I’d go to many more places where I’ve never been,
I’d eat more ice cream and fewer peas,
I’d have more real problems and fewer imaginary ones.

I was one of those people who lived
prudently and fully every minute of his life;
of course I had moments of joy.
But if I could go back I’d try
to have only good moments.

Because if you don’t know, thats what life is made of,
only moments; don’t lose the now.

I was the type who never went anywhere
without a thermometer,
a hot-water bottle,
an umbrella and a parachute,
If I could live again, I’d travel lighter.

If I could live again, I’d go barefoot
from the beginning of spring
and stay barefoot until the end of autumn.

I’d ride in more carts,
I’d watch more sunrises,
and play with more children,
If I had another life ahead of me.

But now I am 85…
and I know that I am dying.

(Jorge Luis Borges)

Inspirational.

Why not make your own website?

For years I thought how cool it would be to have my own website. I was always confused and unsure as to where to start. You may be feeling this way too. I found a great tool to make the job of putting yourself 'out-there' in:    SITE BUILD IT

The great thing with this product is that your online experience can also generate an income. Why not follow the link and have a look around? I have found developing my own website extremely enjoyable and satisfying, you might too.

Self trust.

I remember when I first started teaching how anxious I was until I realised that I was not alone. If I had a situation that I found challenging, I could always consult older and wiser heads. It gave me great peace of mind to know that I had 'back-up'. As my own experience grew I found I was able to offer similar comfort to teachers new to the profession and especially to those I was training to become teachers.
I apply a similar thought pattern when I approach difficulties in everyday life. Firstly I ask myself is there anyone I can trust to help me with the problem. Secondly I ask myself if I already trust myself enough to handle things on my own. More often than not the answer is a resounding 'yes'.
Try this approach yourself, you may find it useful.

Peaceful Warrior new book!

Dan Millman (my mentor for over 20 years)author of the Peaceful Warrior Series, has just released a new book. I thought you might like to take a look:

 The Four Purposes of Life: Finding Meaning and Direction in a Changing World


I have it on order and will let you know what I think soon.

Just take 10 minutes

So many of us go through our lives with problems and issues. We often become so familiar with these that we treat them as a part of us and do nothing about them. Here's an idea. Take just 10 minutes today to sit and write down all the problems you have in your life (count yourself luck if you only have 10 minutes worth :)). Give each one a number - no particular order- and resolve to attempt to sort out one of these issues in the next 7 days. For example; you might have had mild toothache for years and just learned to put up with it. Resolve not to put up with it and at least book a dentist appointment.
After this issue is resolved to the best of your ability, return to the list and have a go at the next one. It could be related to finances or relationships. Whatever the issue/problem is, it won't solve itself, but often we put up with things in our busy lives that either we don't want to address or feel we don't know how to. Take small steps and even ask for help; you don't have to handle things on your own - unless you are a very clever dentist. :)